I Hate Valentine's Day

Dear Nia Vardalos & John Corbett,

Please stop making movies together. You are NOT the Tracy & Hepburn of new Hollywood. My Big Fat Greek Wedding while one of my favorite movies was a fluke, a unicorn that bolted forth out of the cinematic dust bowl that was the summer of 2002.

Nia, don't get me wrong I am rooting for you sweetheart, I have seen every movie you've made since that $200 million dollar summer. I even bought the sound track to Connie & Carla because I am a big fat gay man. And while some of the principles you touch on in "I Hate Valentine's Day" are right on the money, in this single girl's opinion, the rest is just couched in cliché after cliché.

I think the magic of My Big Fat Greek Wedding is while the story is a timeless one you managed to re-invent the packaging; made it fresh with your own perspective on heritage that had never really been seen on film since "Zorba the Greek".

Girl I like you, because you remind me of me, but I have noticed you've "thinned" out a bit since 2002, husband included! Don't think I don't see you working him into your projects, love it by the by!! I believe in the trickle down theory that once you "make it" you put your talented friends that stood by you through the lean years in where you can so thank you for keeping the dream alive. I mean be healthy but I miss the old you with the soft edges, you look too tailored now. Be careful of the dreaded "cat eye" syndrome that lurks in the puffy, pink back rooms of LA's finest filler & injection salons!!

I don't know, I feel like everything you've done has been processed through the Hollywood machine trying to find the 2002 magic which of course is a vortex of suck that reverses all the whimsy & different right out of a picture. My suggestion, get the back to your roots and get the suits out of your hair. And find another leading man, I mean I adore John, have since "Northern Exposure", but you need a new palette to play off, the jelly she is tired of you two.

ps-the two things I did love about the picture, you gave Rachel Dratch a job and you made Zoe Kazan look fat. Thank you!