These are the things I remember about my Uncle Mike.
He was my mother’s baby brother, he wore horn rimmed glasses and was a stocky kid, and she called him Bubba. They were like two peas in a pod. In fact he spent a lot of time with her and my Dad after they got married. I have some home movies of their camping trips; Mom & Dad were sort of the cool parents since Gram and Granddad were older.
Michael wanted to play football but my grandmother wouldn’t let him, too dangerous. I always thought that decision was wrong Uncle Mike was the kind of man God wanted to play football. Big, tough, strong, I think he missed out on a life course because of Gram’s fear, but then again we’ll never know for sure. He served in the Air Force and my Dad used to tease him with the “junior birdman” song while inverting his hands to make a mask. It always made me laugh. While stationed in Turkey he sent my sister and me these beautiful gold & blue Moroccan shirts which we loved and pictures of him riding a camel.
When he got out of the service he stayed with us awhile and he had a dog named Blue, a big black and gold Sheppard who upon entering the house that night ran into my sisters’ room scared the crap out of her and then promptly jumped thru the sliding glass door. It was a miracle he wasn’t killed only having some minor cuts and scrapes. Blue was a sweet heart and occasionally slept in my closet (aka my fort) with me, the day Uncle Mike had to give up Blue I remember him standing outside next to my Dad’s old Ford Falcon crying.
He loved that dog but had to give him up for adoption because he was moving to Pittsburg, PA. Where he met his wife Linda, I was a bride’s maid in their wedding; my sister was the flower girl. It was the first and last time anyone would see me in mauve. They had two girls while living up there Sarah & Ashley, and then they decided to move back to Florida. I was a teenager by then and didn’t have a lot of friends. I remember spending summers hanging out with them, not unlike what my folks did for him when he was young. They helped me study for my driver’s exam and I remember making them laugh a lot. That time was definitely me cutting my teeth on being a comic, only I didn’t know it. His family grew by two more over the years Melissa & Mike Jr. and they ended up moving back to Pittsburg. I was in college and didn’t hear from them much but got updates through Mom. Sarah’s doing this, Melissa’s riding her bike etc….
When my Mom died Uncle Mike was as badly torn up as I was and I remember him hugging me so long and so tight I might just die. I wanted to, but he told me he loved Laura & me and would always be here if we needed anything.
Years later when Gram got sick she moved in with Michael and when the asbestos was close to snuffing her out I went to Pittsburgh to see them, it was really hard, Gram thought I was my Mom and Uncle Mike was beside himself. I did get to show them a tape of me performing at Stand-Up NY; they laughed so hard and couldn’t believe that it was me up there saying all those things. It was a nice respite from the looming passing of Gram.
The last time I saw him it was at my father’s memorial service. The tribe came down and we made the best of a horrible situation. We talked of staying in touch, maybe even going camping in the summer but that never manifested. Laura and I knew that with his big family he had enough to worry about, plus we could take care of ourselves and we were finding our own way in the world.
For me I stayed distant because he reminded me too much of my Mom. They had the same curly dark hair and kind eyes. It just hurt too much to look in his face and see her there. Unlike other members of our family Uncle Mike never had a problem with my sister and I being adopted. Sharing blood wasn’t a requirement to be family or for him to love us unconditionally. He was a good man and I am a better person because he influenced my life, I will miss him but I know that Mom was waiting for him at the gate and they haven’t stopped talking since…..
RIP – February 9, 2009
4 comments:
This is beautifully written! Your uncle waws a wonderful man! He will be sorely missed by all that knew him. I had the priviledge of knowing him through work, he will missed! I am sorry for your loss.
brandy, that was awesome and you know dad would be so happy to know that you are thinking about him. I just wish i could have one more day with him, but you are right aunt mariea grammmie and dad are talking eachothers ears off. i miss them all and i too am the person i am today because of my dad. I love him so much, remember you still have family in Pittsburgh and we love you so much. ~ashley
i love dad and i miss him so much brandy!
Although in fact beautifully written, You did leave out your other Uncle, be that as it may, He is still a blood relative to Your Mother and our Uncle - like it or not and has gone through more than you could ever phathom since my Mother died...
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