VMA's - Circa 2009

The media has been in a whirl of controversy over all the inappropriate outbursts this week. The latest from the VMA’s, which I don’t think I have watched since the infamous Madonna/Britney/Christina triple kiss. I tuned in because Russell Brand made quite a showing on The View the Friday before and I couldn’t resist seeing what my saucy, tightly panted Brit might pull.

The show itself has evolved into a masturbatory platform for plugging projects. Including the premiere of the “New Moon” Trailer which is a feature film and while containing music is NOT a music video at all!! This massively overproduced circus is NOT about the awards themselves numbering 15. It takes an hour of pre-show and then nearly 3 hours of actual show to present just 7 little, silver moon men. The other 8 don’t make it to the tube because they revolve around silly things like, direction, choreography & special effects. Clearly not material worthy of presentation by some dirty, white kid staring on the WB 11’s time to stop, pick out an outfit and convey weak patter before another commercial break. Much ado about nothing waxes through my mind like a beacon from the bard.

Ultimately, the entire spectacle was over shadowed by Kanye West’s rude interruption of Taylor Swift's win. In light of this I would like to say that some of the performances should be noted. The Michael Jackson tribute that opened the show was off the chain. Now I love me some Madonna but if she had said “I” one more time “I” would have had to bitch slap my icon of choice. It did occur to me that MTV is the house that Michael and Madonna built. Sure there are other artists that can be included in the foundation of the Music Television Network but the infrastructure hangs off the decades of Michael & Madonna turning out videos that captured our imaginations and made us move to the beat. It’s sad they don’t play videos anymore.

Then Pink flying through the air singing Sober was a little Barnum for me but I couldn’t believe that she was turning it out high above the masses with their mouths agape.

Lady Gaga working her tranny ass with outfits that I appreciate but do not understand. She is walking art people. Period. She removed the red lace blotter from her face after winning her first Moon Man and exclaimed, "This is for the gays!" Made me reminisce over Camryn Manheim’s "This is for all the fat girls!" Love it when celebrities give props to the people that got them there!!

And last but not least Beyoncé….girl. I was a mediocre fan before, but I am a true believer now. Not just because you managed to “fix” Kanye’s misstep by being the classiest VMA winner ever, but because your live performance made me believe that some people have talent. Actual physical talent, not just canned lip-sync’d lazy-ography (insert my review of Britney’s performance at MSG). I still can’t believe anyone dances like that and doesn’t break a hip or an ankle or snaps a knee. Girl you turned my eye and I have nothing but love for you now even though you made Obsessed.